List of reasons why I’m an awful Human Being

He confesses theft from childhood shop dares and cafeteria snacks through Lawson coffee, Pokémon cards, and a Japanese spoon. He admits cheating on several partners, blaming unmet needs and loneliness, while insisting meaningful, satisfying relationships would deter him. He defends lying to spare feelings, admits anonymous online rudeness, then successfully cooks Turkish shish kebabs alone.

The confession mixes remorse with self-justification, framing misconduct as controllable responses to excitement or loneliness.